Brilliant strategic idea - try to persuade parent company that I am a useless numpty and that they would be better off without me. Managed to do so surprisingly quickly. Parent company give me oodles of cash to bugger off and set up own company.

Spent all of this year developing my new empire. Whirlwind of strategic meetings, press releases and integrated vertical relationships. The whole world now knows how brilliant I am.

Haven't managed to get any business yet.

Am investing all of my time and considerable skill in building my empire.

Nobody can be in any doubt about my talent and brilliance.

Haven't managed to get any business yet.

Not too worried, still got a bundle of cash.

Ooops. My Sanyo pocket calculator says we will run out of money this year.

Devise brilliant strategy for getting business.

Employ talented people to get new business for me. New business people learn everything that I know surprisingly quickly.

Congratulate myself on my innovation and foresight.

New business people, inspired by me, bring in loads of business. They are of course grateful for my insight and brilliance.

Strategically exceptional decision to employ lots of new vastly talented and intelligent people pays off. They have so much to offer. Of course I don't listen to them. If they were really so good, they would be me.

Big company offers me a big big bucket of cash to buy my business from me. Only one condition attached to deal. I have to resign with immediate effect. Of course, without me there is no business. Wisely, I turn the offer down. Suckers.

New business people continue to bring in new business. My brilliant strategy of employing more talented people ensures that I can make pots of money and buy lots of shiny new toys.

Move into brand spanking new corporate HQ.

Issue lots of press releases to remind people how brilliant I am.

Inspired repositioning of company as experts in our field. Customers say “No, you aren't”. But, what do they know, they just pay our bills.

New business people grow too big for their boots. Call me “overweening, puffed up, arrogant prick”, whatever that means.

Fire new business people. Get other new business people.

Devise inspired new product for the market. Bet the company on it. That's what I'm here for. Inspired strategic decision making.

Customers tell me they don't want to buy it. But what do they know.

New business people can't sell my brilliant product.

Fire them and get some new better ones.

Move into new corporate headquarters. Even bigger and shinier than the old one.

Issue lots of press releases in case people had forgotten how brilliant I am.

Inspired and brilliant strategic decision to invite customers to the opening of the Jamlabel Institute of Brilliant Thinking. Nobody comes. Too busy paying our bills I guess.

New business people can't sell my brilliant product yet.

Appear to have too many people and not enough work. How did that happen?

Get rid of useless surplus people. Much more room in shiny corporate HQ now.

Fire useless new business people for not being able to sell my fantastically strategic product.

Decide to do new business myself. After all, didn't I teach those people all they knew?

Haven't managed to get any business yet.

Haven't managed to get any business yet.

Ooops, my Sanyo pocket calculator tells me that all the money is finished.

The business world will be a poorer place without my brilliance.

Fire all remaining very talented people.

Close doors.

I reflect on my brilliant career and ask myself "What have I learned from the last seven years ?".

It's this: That customers don't know as much as me. If they did, then they wouldn't be customers. They would be little old brilliant me.