The outstanding reputation that England's football fans have worked so tirelessly to attain in previous World Cups and other trips abroad has not, it seems, escaped the attention of the 2002 joint hosts, South Korea.

Those nice Ingerlund fans

Moon Dong-Hoo, the general secretary of the South Korean World Cup organising committee, in a statement to the world press, issued the following warning for any potential trouble makers. In the interests of journalistic accuracy, we have not changed a single word.

Referring specifically to English hooligans, he said, "I will expect them to be identified and not allowed to leave England. If they come here we will attempt to distinguish them from proper fans and our intelligence services have the power to prevent entry into the country.

But if they are on the streets we will deploy riot police or the army task force carrying guns. If there are any scenes similar to Charleroi (Euro 2000) or Marseille (World Cup 98) then the hooligans will be arrested and brought to full trial. If they have caused personal injury the sentence is seven years in jail. If an object such as a broken bottle has been used then the sentence is 10 years.

If you are sentenced to 10 years by a Korean court then you serve that sentence. I think it is fair to say you would not want to spend 10 years in a Korean jail."

It's also fair to say that, even allowing for such an inscrutable piece of oriental understatement to conclude with, we don't think he's bluffing.

So, even though our team won't be there, it looks like it could still be a hugely entertaining World Cup for Scottish fans after all, and we look forward to seeing justice finally prevail at long last against the neanderthal element who delight in dragging our nearest neighbour's name into the mud, and whose brainless actions and xenophobic bile spoil it for the majority of English fans and disgust all decent supporters of every nation.

10 years? Bollocks to that. Throw the bloody key away, we say.

Let's hope they like rice.